A year ago today I walked into CFC and fell apart. I spent 5 months getting physically stronger and mentally saner. I felt ready to go when I left, but honestly I thought I could keep little bits of Frank and stay in recovery. I was wrong. Bits turned into pieces, which turned into chunks... And here I am a year later. Not back to square one, but definitely too close. I've learned so much and in a lot of ways I'm healthier. I can keep appointments and talk to people without totally losing it. I don't cry when I eat. I don't try to control what others eat (as much...). I fall asleep earlier and don't work out 4 hours a day... But I see where this is going.
I'm trying to get back to cfc if I can; for a "tune-up." I'm a pound away from being under 100 which is not ok. The Frank is proud. I'm embarrassed and ashamed I've let people down.
I'm not sure what I wanted to say in this blog, but I felt like I should commemorate my year-mark somehow.
I hope you'll all forgive my failings and celebrate the small improvements. Here's hoping next year will be better.